this is exactly how i feel right now.
lately i'm finding myself interpreting my faith the way i want it to fit my social opinions. and i am also finding that it is making me incredibly cynical and critical, among other things.
i often tend to resist or play devil's advocate, when it comes to a lot of things that play toward the idea of "corporate religion." whether it is gender roles, prayer, etc., i want to be the kind of christian who considers all sides of a debate and feels comfortable going against the common belief. and generally i do.
but recently i've felt as though i have neglected to listen to the Word because i'm listening to myself. and it has caused me to procrastinate something fierce when it comes to this task of reading the entire Bible. i'm putting it off because i don't want to do what everyone else is doing. which, as we all know, just causes me to do what everyone else is doing -- just on the opposite side. i'm also putting it off because i tried this before, and in all honesty, it was kind of boring. and that, my friends, is what truly scares me. how on earth do i live out a faith that bores me?
so i'm going to begin this journey, albeit a little late, in hope and prayer that i can rediscover a faith that is exciting and not rule-driven, and silence (ok, at least turn down the volume on) my own words to experience the ones that really matter.
wish me luck.